I was uploading photos I had taken at a wedding I'd been hired to shoot last month, when I noticed the tiny Xanga icon in my bookmarks bar. "Well, heeey! It's been FOREVER!" I thought as I clicked through.

The interface hasn't changed too much since the last time I checked in 2010. My weblogs are still exactly the way I left them: public! 

I read through some of the last few entries I wrote last year...going as far as 2009, the darker days.

After getting over how appalled I was by my terrible writing, I started to remember how life was for me that year. Stressful. Sad. Alone. Betrayed. Rudely awakened.

It's an amazing feeling, looking back at how far you've come.

I'm always apprehensive when people ask me to give up entire playlists. I'm not big on giving people CDs I've mixed myself...or even referring my favourite artists. Yes, I'm that selfish.

Good music is like a diamond in the rough. It takes good, hard work to discover these treasures. I do my research. I read the blogs, search the right websites, listen attentively to the radio, follow my favourite artists and DJs, download/buy the music myself and I never stop building my massive CD collection because I do believe in supporting artists. I strongly feel that people should do the same when it comes to their music. Don't be so lax with something that is so important in your life!

I'm really passionate about this, and hope people understand this about me when I refuse to share.

When I'm 31, I will have better things to do than to spill details about my personal life with an intriguing stranger. I will not think twice to be faithful. I will hone in on my killer instincts. I run 5ks. I'm no respiratory therapist, but I'm sure I'll be doing what I love. Something creative. I won't lead men on, because I won't feel the need to. I will further develop my taste in class and respect for the self and for others. I will check off a lot of places that I've been, and certainly not alone. By the time I'm 31, I may have a son or a daughter that will fill me with fulfillment, joy and pride.

I most definitely will not be the incomplete soul that you are.

I'm telling you that it's me. It's been ME all along, no matter what the confusion.

Habitual lateness, sarcasm, looking for problems, preoccupation with your own thoughts, overworking, name-calling, drinking/using drugs, lying, blaming, perfectionism, being a people pleaser, impatience, overspending, being judgemental, withholding affection, keeping secrets, being bossy, procrastinating.

When we engage in these behaviors, we are disconnecting or losing touch with the people our behaviors are being projected upon, as well as ourselves. When we're constantly late, we are not respecting the time of those who are waiting for us. When we're sarcastic, we are trying to mask our true feelings by using "humour". When we over-work, we stop listening to our own body and mind's needs. When we lie, we're keeping a wall around us. When we drink or do drugs, probably the most direct way to disconnect, we create an illusion, a world that is "easier" to be in than reality.